BAD MEDICINE AND THE BARIATRIC BLUES

I'm sure many of you are wondering how my former partner in crime is doing. For those of you who were late joining this blog, it originally had two authors. The other Tilly in Tillies was my friend Tera; a married, thirty-year old, mother of two, who lives and works in Texas.

We were fed up with our weight and wanted a way to communicate, articulate, and share our struggles.  A blog seemed the perfect solution.  We could post photos, share our emotions of the day, exchange recipes, and monitor success and failure, all without having to commit to scheduled times for phone calls.  It seemed a simple scenario.  She could share one day, and me the next.  We might just develop an audience who could learn from, and identify with, at least one of the pair of us.  But when Tera's world caught fire, keeping up with the health and fitness mission, and the blog based off it, became too much.

I was hoping Tera would continue to mind her health.  Sadly, she continued to gain weight.  Having reached a pinnacle of frustration, she sought help from the medical community.  She was referred to a Bariatric surgeon who wasted no time selling her on surgery.  When she mentioned this in an email, I was flabbergasted.  How could a perfectly healthy, thirty year-old woman, who was much younger and weighed a lot less than me, be an ideal candidate for surgery?!?  Has the world gone mad??!

I wasted no time in forcing my overbearing opinion down her throat.  I had some questions about this diagnosis.  Did anyone recommend a diet and some exercise first??  How about a change in lifestyle??  Were the words: habit, behavior, therapy, or medication mentioned??  I was furious. Not at her, at the medical community!

I had a sour experience that fueled this reaction and my passion to take matters into my own hands.  Before starting the blog and being diagnosed with an insulin condition, I had sought the help of a bariatric specialist.  This seemed like a great idea after it was recommended by one of the TV doctor shows.  Go to someone who specializes in obesity so they can evaluate your health, check for causes, help you manage any existing conditions, and design for you a health and fitness plan to get you on track to a healthier weight.  Should your issues be extreme, they can also administer medication or perform surgery. Perfect!

But when I began to seek help, I was denied everything that preceded the word surgery on that list.  First I called my health insurance to see what visits and treatments would be covered.  Counseling, nutritional advice, medications, working with a dietitian or personal trainer- none of that was covered.  The only way I could get help with my diet was if I was diagnosed with a debilitating condition like Diabetes.  I told the insurance rep, "I don't want Diabetes, that's why I'm asking for help!"  They wouldn't pay for any preventative measures, but they would pay for bariatric surgery.  I would think a few meetings with a bariatric counsellor or a dietitian would cost less than a surgery.  It didn't matter.  They weren't interested in helping me.

I decided to skip insurance and go right to the source.  Turns out, no one seemed interested in helping me with any of these measures.  I was being sold on the benefits of surgery over the phone, and these doctors hadn't even met with me yet.  I could be capable of battling this without an invasive procedure, but I wasn't even presented that as an option.  Nor did anyone seem concerned about discussing the risks involved in surgery.  The attitude was, "people call us when they want to have their stomachs stapled, when that becomes you, feel free to call back!"  This wasn't going anything like what Dr.Oz said.

So I decided I was going to give Tera the medical advice I had hoped would be dispensed to me on one of those phone calls.  I said...


"Tera, you are a healthy, intelligent, young woman who is perfectly capable of losing weight through diet and exercise.  This problem does not require a surgeon or a hospital stay.  What it requires is some discipline and lifestyle changes.   I suggest you start exercising thirty minutes a day, packing your lunch, getting eight hours sleep, and finding a way to reduce your stress.  You may need to find a different job, hire a baby sitter, or get a divorce, but I suggest you start making the necessary life changes to bring your health back around.  If you don't, I guarantee this will be the first in a line of many surgeries you will need to correct your failing health.  When you don't address the underlying issues, new problems continue to surface!"


Tera brooded for a day or two, then emailed me to say, "I knew you'd give it to me straight!"

I am not against Bariatric surgery.  So save the hate mail.  What I am against, is it being dispensed as the first or second solution for anybody with a weight problem.  I remember when this surgery first hit the scene you had to be a certain size, and in a certain condition, to qualify for it.  Things had to be life threatening.  It didn't take long for that to change.  If you are one of those people at rope's end who is facing a life or death situation, HAVE THE SURGERY!!  CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!  DON'T WALK, RUN!!  But if you are someone who can still move around, exercise, make it to the gym...don't sell yourself short!  There is something to be said for taking responsibility for a situation, for behavior modification, for ownership, for making the necessary changes to ensure that all facets of your health are being cared for by you!

Bariatric surgery.  Yes, some have great results!  But others get infections, remain overweight, have bowel troubles, or continue to overeat and throw up because they never changed their behavior.  Why would you want to put yourself through that if you can do this without it!

I am happy to report that Tera has momentarily shelved the idea to have surgery.  She has decided instead to follow the diet they prescribe following surgery.  She has lost 20 pounds!  I am so proud of her!  I will support her no matter what she decides in the end.  Maybe it is me who is the fool to battle through this problem in a slow and difficult way.  But for now I carry on.  I hope others will do the same.

"Your only limits are self imposed."